The Expatriate Life: Cleaning the Phone Directory

There are certain symbolic acts of our modern world that denote finality in a techno-worldly way.

The other day as I raced through the directory in my Alcatel cell phone looking for a number, I sped across a few names I realized I wouldn't be using again, any time soon.

Like sirens of a past life, the familiar names stared blankly at me from their silent roll call mesmerizing me momentarily.

As I zipped by, I knew that these numbers were never to be used again in my Kathmandu life. Although the names were dear, the friendships tender, the days spent in conversation and thought among the deeper parts of my recent years in Nepal, the numbers were no longer reachable, no longer to be dialed, no longer w/ the voices of friends on the other side -- no longer a part of my daily life in this occasionally transient town.

Yet, I had to go back, gaze curiously at those names, the cell phone numbers distinct from their home numbers, the individuals so clear and unique, the faces so fresh (Shaku n I had dinner with two just the other evening...).

Even as their numbers were no longer living, their lives were still so fragrant of aspects of my own life here in Kathmandu.

I've had this experience, this pause in life's movement before. There are dearly loved friends who have left this world whose names still remain on my email address list or rest peacefully in ink in my rarely used pocket-size address book, an archive of the pre-technological era when I left the US a few decades ago to begin my lifelong travels away.

Robin, Jerry, Buddy... these names appear, at times, when I scroll through our iMac email address book, still youthful in their presence on these electronic accessories. Still alive in my thoughts, memories and reflections. Voices that still speak to me, recalling precious, joyful times past. Vibrant yet in their perpetually undying state of existence, offering me advice and perspective on this floating, ephemeral world.

My Dad, too, still present in the email address he shared w/ Mom, 'gyndoc@...'. The father-protector-provider image who raised and cared for his four children over the decades of his middle life. Always proud of his Ob-Gyn accomplishment from humble beginnings as the son of a Russian immigrant in America facing hardship and discrimination while studying relentlessly to create a new life amidst the opportunity of the expanding suburbs, serving his patients thoughtfully and compassionately while urging his children on in the world.

Even now, two years after his return to the original source of life, Dad's favorite appellation appears whenever I write Mom or call her on Skype. Her husband, friend, soulmate, partner. My father. Still hermetically sealed in these modern monikers of identity and existence.

In many ways, I believe his spirit is recalled and renewed whenever I use that email address or call Mom in Florida.

"Hi, Dad! How's life on the other side? Just want you to know that you're still here with us... We're sending our love", I seem to say...

So I stare at these dear friends' names, Kai & Susan, Dave & Claudia, Ted & Ellen, who have temporarily migrated to other points on this frothy, distant world, Lima, Bangkok and New York (by way of New Mexico...) -- no longer denizens of this Himalayan Valley we call home. No longer just a ride away in Sita Pila or Jawalakhel or Chauni, where 'dal bhaat' would be on the table or dinner w/ friends and acquaintances with multiple glasses of wine or vodka-laced Opis in hand.

Even Leah's dearest friend, Anna, a sweet, fresh-faced girl from Iceland with whom our cherub would spend hours on the phone in the evening reviewing their homework or discussing Moshi Monsters to their complete delight, has now departed Kathmandu. Her number, her Mom's and their home #, all dormant in my phone's accessories, silent, unringable, out of imagination's reach. After a summer in Iceland, she, her brother, parents and dog will all be in Nairobi for the next couple of years. Away from Leah's near mandala, a more distant presence, a shadow, a memory of childhood's friendship until they meet again, some day.

'Here today, gone to Maui.' -- as they say.

Kai, gentle, intellectual soul. Forever seeking in his imagination and on paper to put the misplaced pieces of the Middle East and his Jerusalem childhood together again. Thoughtful, kind, innocent. Absorbed in his effort to explain history and craft it for others to understand. Alive in his academic aviary overlooking Swayambunath struggling to graft the complexities of Nepali society onto his knowledge of global events and cultures. Unending discussions on the US, Nepal, Israel, Bhutan, politics and perspective. Talisman for Sue, his worldy-wise, lovely ambitious muse, as they guide son Josh on his journey away from home. Generous to his friends, offering toasts to life at Sue's call while sharing joyful Turkey Day and Pesach holidays over the past four years.

Dave, enthusiastic, eager, dedicated, father of three absolutely adorable, smart and gentle kids. A handsome lawyer with heart, engaged in the world, involved in Nepal's political transformation, chair of the Lincoln School board w/ a boyish enthusiasm for the possibilities of life while challenging the status quo and powers that be. Loving life partner of Claudia, another vibrant, intelligent, beautiful mother-achiever with flowing blonde curls surrounding that impish, smiling face. Friends since Ez (or was it Josh...) was born while we stayed at their BKK apartment when he worked for Save. Alive, awake, charmed with the world outside the US and the possibilities ahead.

Ted, father guru to generations of students of Nepali culture and language. Ex-Chair of the South Asia Dept at Columbia, pianist, scholar, novelist of Sherlock Holmes Asian tales. Wise, witty and charming perched in Chauni casting his cold eye on the social and political games that pass for democracy in modern Nepal. Amused and amusing as he recounts tales of Nepali academics and political leaders over decades. Our Bansbari neighbor during the 1990 'Jan Andolan' (People's Movement) when an earlier revolution was in the air and on the streets. Father four times over. Husband, guide and companion to Ellen, an ambassador's daughter, lifelong discoverer-anthropologist searching the intimate realities of Newari culture and eternal ama-hood. Turning now to America for their young childrens' education.

These are the friends to whom I bid a sentimental 'adieu' as I silently chanted my friendship mantras and sacred blessings as I pressed 'delete' after their names in the Alcatel phone directory.

Whoosh! Gone-ski! A sand image swept away from the Nepal mandala!

Yet, I know they are not gone forever, just no longer nearby on the other side of my Kathmandu cell phone and daily existence. I can press their numbers again and again or let the phone ring as long as I like, but the dry, recorded woman's voice will still remain:

"Maf garne hola tapaile dial garnebaieko number ahile upalupdi hunu sukaina."

Sorry, the number you have dialed cannot be reached at the moment. Please try again later.

But, in this case, sadly, this weekend, or even next, there are no immediate laters, just the memories of the friendships that have animated our lives over the recent years to give us joy and meaning...

"Maf garne hola tapaile dial garnebaieko number ahile upalupdi hunu sukaina."

Citizens’ Participation in Nepal's Constitution-Making

For those interested, here is the UNDP 2010 Annual Report from Nepal that describes what I was working on last year w/ my wonderful colleagues. It's all part of our effort to ensure greater participation and engagement across Nepal in the drafting of the new secular, federal, democratic republican constitution -- based on the inclusive priorities set forth in the 2007 Interim Constitution.

Alas, however, this constitution for a 'New Nepal' has been delayed as it was meant to be promulgated a year ago, according to that Interim Constitution. The Constituent Assembly (CA) is now in its second extension (until August 31st, 2011), but there is limited confidence that the CA and the major political parties will complete their work in the next month to share at least a draft constitution.

If not, major questions will be raised about how and when the CA will complete this work, as well as finalize the outstanding aspects of the peace process. So much work has already gone into both the peace and constitution drafting process that we can only hope (and pray...) that the senior leaders are able to resolve their differences and permit dear Nepal to step peacefully and successfully into its future...
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Citizens’ Participation in Nepal's Constitution-Making

The 'Support to Participatory Constitution Making in Nepal' project’s Democratic Dialogues and radio programmes informed citizens and key stakeholders about the constitution making process.

Democratic Dialogues

In 2009, SPCBN supported the holding of 2,274 local Democratic Dialogues ('Loktantrik Sambad') that raised awareness and provided local inputs into the making of the new constitution.

The plan in 2010 was to run dialogues to gather comments on the draft constitution. The absence of the draft meant that the 2010 Democratic Dialogues provided an opportunity to disseminate information and collect opinions on the 11 CA Thematic Committee reports, which represented the progress to then on constitution making. These dialogues were held at VDC, constituency levels and were attended by 259,708 citizens.

VDC and Constituency Dialogues — Between March and September 2010 dialogues were held in Nepal’s 3,915 Village Development Committees. They were run by trained facilitators from 18 consortia of civil society organisations. Ninety master trainers trained over 1,300 facilitators on imparting information to people with limited literacy and involving less vocal participants.

After each dialogue, reports were prepared on the main concerns raised and suggestions made. These reports were then compiled into 240 constituency-wise reports, which were presented to the CA leadership and members.

Feedback to the Constituent Assembly — Reports were prepared on the points raised at the Constituency Dialogues, after which a report was compiled with the major points from all 240 reports. In November 2010, the 240 constituency reports and a compiled report were submitted to the Constituent Assembly, the CA Chair and individual members representing the opinions of the general public on the shape the constitution should take. Interactions were held with political leaders to inform them about the contents of the main report.

Federalism Dialogues — Federal Dialogues were held in each of the (proposed) capitals of the 14 new provinces proposed by the CA State Restructuring Committee. These were attended by more than 1,150 politicians and civil society representatives. The value of these meetings soon became apparent as amongst all these leading district and regional
level decision makers very few said they had a good knowledge of the proposed new governance structures before the meetings.

Two examples of democratic dialogues for an inclusive constitution:

A VDC Dialogue: Renu Gupta and Raghunath Das were one of the 17 teams of facilitators that facilitated Democratic Dialogues across Dhanusha district in 2010. During a dialogue in May 2010 in Bindi VDC the audience of Yadavs, Chaudharies, Mushahars and other communities listened to the presentations and offered their thoughts and suggestions. In response to the orientation on the report on the Distribution of Natural Resources, Financial Rights and Revenues:

• a former government official said that local resources should be managed by consumer groups as they know best;

• a district member of the Nepal Sadbhawana Party said that special provisions should be made for young widows and women from marginalized groups; and

• a school teacher asked how the new constitution would address the large gap in the quality of education between government and private schools.

A Constituency Dialogue: Some of the many issues raised at a dialogue held in August 2010 by the Madhesi NGO Federation in Bara district were as follows:

• A Third Gender person passionately called for the rights of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people to be recognized in the new Constitution.

• Many participants called for changing the rules to allow younger and less educated people to become members of parliament as the current, mostly older, educated members do not understand their problems.

• The president of the local Bar Association called for the political parties to be more flexible to resolve the contentious issues to make the constitution on time.

Many of the most effective dialogues have been ones such as this that brought Constituent Assembly members face-to-face with the concerns of their constituents.

A Brief FB Dialogue on Extremism, Religion and Assumptions

This is a Facebook discussion between friends just after the horrific events in Oslo and Norway earlier this week. An effort to better understand the context of such acts of wickedness and the societies in which they occur. Do we make assumptions too quickly based on our fears and experience of those fears? Do we tend to look at the 'outsider' to be responsible for the evil we find within? Are news media responsible for exaggerating those fears? What responsibility does the media have to avoid snap judgements and exploiting social phobias? How much has history changed over time? How can the individual safely challenge society's assumptions? How do we learn to self-perceive our own assumptions?
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FB: The [Oslo] attack comes only days after Norway indicted Mullah Krekar, the founder (with bin Laden) of Ansar al-Islam. Earlier this month, Krekar threatened to attack government officials if they deported him, as they indicated they might. The Islamist war against infidels continues...

KDL: We must be careful of our assumptions guiding our thoughts, as reasonable as they may appear to us without all of the facts in place. First, this is a horror and tragedy. Second, comes politics, which is still being assessed, right-wing maniac or foreign terror. Time, painfully, will tell...

ST: Ah, yes. It begins to look more like Oklahoma City . . . .

FB: It seems the NYTimes reporting that a terror group, Ansar al-Jihad al-Alami, or the Helpers of the Global Jihad, claiming responsibility for the attack was premature. They've taken down the story so reporting. Their first cut at history was so wrong they couldn't leave any evidence of the error.

KDL: But your confident assurance, dear F., may be on FB for eternity...

FB: You are correct. I suppose I could delete my comment -- the NYTimes way -- to remove traces of my premature confident assurance, but I can live with it. Such mistakes serve to remind us -- just as others will -- when we make them. Cheers.

KDL: But, F., this really isn't about the NYT or Fox News or how long a post stays on-line in the digital age... this is about extremism, dogmatism, cruelty n obsession in the human mind. Some are obsessed by Islamic phobia, some by foreign phobia, some by arrogance of their self-perceived superiority in kulture, class, religion et al. This demented young man just shows us the rot that is in every society and religion. No one has a monopoly of perverse nuts who use violence n horror to express their beliefs and dominance. Thus, the religious wars against the other goes on as it has for 1,400 years, alas...

FB: Is it really an irrational fear, having persisted for 1400 years? Is it extremism or human nature -- dark as that may be. Homo homini lupus. As you rightly point out -- careful of our assumptions.

KDL: I think society always perceives an external enemy, often finding evidence w/in its own midst. Fear is an aspect of the human condition, in perpetuity. Every society has it's own extremism within that is projected out. Unfortunately, the children of the Judeo-Xian-Islamic G-d have spent more time fighting over their inheritance than appreciating the diversity of their interpretations of the original teachings.

Alas, empire, trade, resources and arrogance have defined the relationship for most of the time w/ those rare occasions of civility, mutual respect and self-interest permiting a more nuanced and appreciative relationship.

As my wise and thoughtful ten year old daughter, Leah, says, "just saying..."

FB: Is society at fault/responsible for man's inhumanity to man? Or is it just the followers of certain religions? That's a pretty broad brush. Some of the biggest atrocities committed by man against man were in the name of: Stalin, Mao, Hitler -- not exactly followers of the three Abrahamic religions. And does trade serve in opposition to civility, mutual respect, etc. Are you suggesting a return to subsistence existence (which is what we'd have without trade)? Interesting thoughts.

KDL: No, F., you greatly exaggerate. Trade is essential to society n has gone on for millennia. Society is man's necessary existence and a collaboration of his/her greatest triumphs and failings. As you know, economic expansion can be a form of competition which has often resulted in efforts at conquest, war and nationalizm. History is full of atrocities on all scales. The 20th C. may have refined it on an industrial, statist level -- but cruelty is a common refrain in such struggles.

I'm reading a 1,200 page history of Venice that offers a broad perspective on European imperial ambitions, trade relations and constant war. This isn't about a religion, but how religion serves the purpose of society and its ambitions. The war against infidels is a form of heresy that has been a tragic flaw in the Abrahamic religions since early on... a shared myopia witnessed time and again.

and so it continues...

INDRA'S LESSON by Joseph Campbell

INDRA'S LESSON

There is a wonderful story in one of the Upanishads about the god Indra. Now, at this time a great monster had enclosed all the waters of the earth, so there was a terrible drought, and the world was in a very bad condition. It took Indra a while to realize that he had a box of thunderbolts and that all he had to do was drop a thunderbolt on the monster. When he did that, the waters flowed, and the world was refreshed, and Indra said, "What a great boy am I."

So, thinking, "What a great boy am I," Indra goes up to the cosmic mountain and decides to build a palace worthy of such as he. The main carpenter of the gods goes to work, and in quick order he gets the palace into good condition. But every time Indra comes to inspect it, he has bigger ideas about how grandiose the palace should be. Finally, the carpenter says, "My god, we are both immortal, and there is no end to his desires. I am caught for eternity." So he goes to Brahma, the creator god, and complain.

Brahma sits on a lotus, the symbol of divine energy and divine grace. The lotus grows from the navel of Vishnu, who is the sleeping god, whose dream is the universe. So the carpenter comes to the edge of the great pond of the universe and tells his story to Brahma. Brahma says, "You go home. I will fix this up." Brahma gets off his lotus and kneels down to address sleeping Vishnu.

Next morning, at the gate of the palace that is being built, there appears a beautiful blue boy. The porter at the gate goes running to Indra, and Indra says, "Well, bring in the boy." The boy is brought in, and Indra, the king god, sitting on his throne, says, "Young man, welcome. And what brings you to my palace?" "Well," says the boy with a voice like thunder, "I have been told that you are building such a palace as no Indra before you ever built."

And Indra says, "Indras before me, young man— what are you talking about?"

The boy says, "Indras before you. I have seen them come and go, come and go. Just think, Vishnu sleeps in the cosmic ocean, and the lotus of the universe grows from his navel. On the lotus sits Brahma, the creator. Brahma opens his eyes, and a world comes into being, governed by an Indra. Brahma closes his eyes, and a world goes out of being. The life of a Brahma is 432,000 years. When he dies, the lotus goes back, and another lotus is formed, and another Brahma. Then think of the galaxies beyond galaxies in infinite space, each a lotus, with a Brahma sitting on it, opening his eyes, closing his eyes. And Indras? There may be wise men in your court who would volunteer to count the drops of water in the oceans or the grains of sand on the beaches, but no one would count those Brahmin, let alone those Indras."

While the boy was talking, an army of ants parades across the floor. The boy laughs when he sees them, and Indra's hair stands on end, and he says to the boy, "Why do you laugh?" The boy answers, "Don't ask unless you are willing to be hurt."

Indra says, "I ask. Teach." And so the boy points to the ants and says, "Former Indras all. Through many lifetimes they rise from the lowest conditions to the highest illumination. And they think, 'What a good boy am I.' And down they go again."

Indra is sitting there on the throne, and he is completely disillusioned, completely shot. He calls the carpenter and says, "I'm quitting the building of this palace. You are dismissed." So the carpenter got his intention. He is dismissed from the job, and there is no more house building going on.

Indra decides to go out and be a yogi and just meditate on the lotus feet of Vishnu. But he has a beautiful queen named Indrani. And when Indrani hears of Indra's plan, she goes to the priest of the gods and says, "Now he has got the idea in his head of going out to become a yogi."

"Well," says the priest, "come in with me, darling, and we will sit down, and I will fix this up." So they sit down before the king's throne, and the priest says, "Now, I wrote a book for you many years ago on the art of politics. You are in the position of the king of the gods. You are a manifestation of the mystery of Brahma in the field of time. This is a high privilege. Appreciate it, honor it, and deal with life as though you were what you really are. And besides, now I am going to write you a book on the art of love so that you and your wife will know that in the wonderful mystery of the two that are one, Brahma is radiantly present also."

And with this set of instructions, Indra gives up his idea of going out and becoming a yogi and finds that, in life, he can represent the eternal as a symbol.

So each of us is, in a way, the Indra of his own life. You can make a choice, either to throw it off and go into the forest to meditate, or to stay in the world, both in the life of your job, which is the kingly job of politics and achievement, and in your love life with your wife and family.

Now, this is a very nice myth, it seems to me.

Joseph Campbell (1904-1987),
The Power of Myth (with Bill Moyers)
Doubleday, New York, 1988

Walt Whitman: Facing West from California's Shores

Facing West from California's Shores

Facing west from California's shores,
Inquiring, tireless, seeking what is yet unfound,
I, a child, very old, over waves, toward the house of maternity,
the land of migrations, look afar,
Look off the shores of my Western sea, the circle almost circled;
For starting westward from Hindustan, from the vales of Kashmere,
From Asia, from the north, from the God, the sage, and the hero,
From the south, from the flowery peninusulas and the spice islands,
Long having wander'd since, round the earth having wander'd,
Now I face home again, very pleas'd and joyous,
(But where is what I started for so long ago?
And why is it yet unfound?)

Walt Whitman
Leaves of Grass
1855

America 2011: Summertime Draws to an End...

Late Sunday evening in Palm Beach Gardens...

Tomorrow, we turn around this jet plane and head to JFK to exit the US after 3+ precious weeks with friends and family. We've had sweet reunions and visits in New York, Boulder, Colorado, Deep Springs College, Portland, Oregon and now with Mom and Claudia in Southern Florida.

Yet, all good things must pass, as George Harrison sang... which reminds me that his exquisite, soulful song, 'My Sweet Lord', came on the radio as we were heading into the final lap of darkness just approaching Deep Springs College (DSC) about 9 pm after driving five hours straight from Reno along the magnificent Eastern Sierra to celebrate Ezi's 19th birthday the next day, June 28th, with two bottles of champagne, two birthday cakes and one cow card from Carson City.

Another precious memory from this joyful, event-filled three+ weeks in America.

That interlude, the DSC saga, was Shakun and Leah's first opportunity to see the ranch college where Ezi will spend two years of his impressionable young life. We had three nights there in the guest room off the main admin building. Two full days of wandering the DSC oasis, driving down to the salt lake a few miles off the ranch, watching Ez and some students prepare for a day's branding of the calves, strolling up to the reservoir amid the boulders overlooking the ranch for an afternoon swim, eating meals w/ the students, hearing of their lives and studies, with much of the food grown or butchered by the students themselves, having a glass of wine w/ the president and a MacArthur Fellow professor of anthropology, driving up to Bristlecone National Forest at 10,000' in the White Mountains overlooking the DSC valley with the oldest (3,200 years) trees in the world...

Tucked perfectly b/n Devi's June wedding near Denver and Iris' July bat mitzvah in Portland, those few days at DSC were one of the many highlights of this 2011 family vacation to America. Since DSC has a tradition of keeping the graduation for the students themselves, this was the chance to be together at a school which will surely define Ezi's college education in America. A seriously unusual place on the edge of the world. An academic monastery or intellectual ranch, however one wants to put a thumbnail on it, DSC is a remarkable institution that has lasted since 1917 managed by the students themselves with committed professors and an infrastructure of adult supervision based on a firm moral standard, self-reliance, hard work and a vision of independence that can teach us all a lesson or two in life.

Whereas Devi's wedding, the weekend earlier, was an exquisite validation of the even older and hard-earned institution of marriage. Two young souls committing their abiding love in public in state park surrounded by their admiring family and friends. A chance, as well, for me to toast my dearest friend Scott and his wonderful Leiper family who have offered me so much over the decades, not to mention made their own deep-seated family commitment to bringing the best of America to the world outside for four generations. A chance, too, to reunite with Scott and Sochua's beautiful family, Devi, Thida and Malika -- three lovely, impressive, sophisticated young women with their own form of noble ambition, maturity and aesthetic to grace the world.

All of us sitted around Dan Glick's kitchen table near Boulder for five days+ sharing stories, drinking a delicious California rose, catching up on the missing years, laughing, cooking, eating, cleaning, telling stories and walking the flaxen fields in the back that seemed to stretch all the way from the Mississippi to the Rockies. Dan and I hadn't been together since our epic Mustang Chortenistan trek in the summer of 2005 to celebrate the near-end of my Save the Children years. Devi's wedding gave us the opportunity to bring his, Scott's and my worlds together for a rare week-long celebration. With Leslie, Dan's warm, smart, lovely girlfriend, his handsome, world-wise, soccer playing son Kolya and those gentle, good-hearted, compassionate souls, Davis and Catherine in from Oakland with us, that week brought us all even closer together and reunited our adventuresome spirits for the new decade ahead.

Afterwards, Shakun, Leah and I took the 24 hour California Zephyr train from Denver to Reno -- only seven hours delayed in Amtrak time, but a gracious, relaxing way to traverse Colorado, Utah and Nevada with meals ready in the dining car and plenty of time to read and watch the vast American countryside pass outside our window.

From Reno, we had our long day's journey into night to find Ezra's world out on the California-Nevada border. Then, after those 2+ days at DSC, we enjoyed a full day in Yosemite National park on our drive back to Reno. After lunch at a diner where we met a Sherpa from Taplejung cooking our burgers, we took a side trip to June Lake. One 'shuff' of a waterfall coming off those Eastern Sierra and we decided to change our plans and head into Yosemite for the night rather than continue up to Tahoe. Whoosh!!

Tuolomne Meadows was full of snow with swollen rivulets overflowing and as much ice in some of the lakes as if the glaciers had just recently receded. We took a late afternoon stroll amid the meadows with the deer and the granite glistening before the long ride down to the valley floor. There, in g-d's country, Bridelveil and Yosemite Falls were awe-inspiring! There was so much mist coming off those falls, rushing ponderous with the heavy melted snow of winter, that it seemed like rain as we walked closer. A sighting of a bear near the road created a small traffic jam before we finally went looking for a place to stay at the height of the summer season. Fortunately, the nature g-ds were with us, so when the plush and overdone Awanhee Hotel reminded us that they are booked a year in advance, a Curry cabin for four with an attached bath opened just for us as I called. Definitely much more accomodating and attractive than proverbial Jonah's whale, we accepted immediately, then went off for avocado burgers and margaritas in Curry Village before calling it a very good night (and day...).

Portland, OR: as they say, 'where young people go to retire...' has been a generous and gracious host to the Leslie-chans for many years now. Settled originally by our dearest friends, Dave and Lisa Ellenberg, of Brown, DC, Istanbul, Kathmandu, Tokyo, Berkeley and many famous compass points in between, many other Kathmandu-ites have come since to this verdant land.

Once we realized that Scott's daughter Devi was getting married near Boulder just a week before Iris, Dave n Lisa's daughter, was being bat mitzvahed in Portland, it was nearly impossible to resist making these events the center-piece of our summer vacation. Wise, indeed -- especially for someone who has missed so many family and friends' events due to the undeniable distance of Kathmandu from the rest of the known universe (especially the Western half of that universe...).

As much as Devi's wedding was for the immediate family and Devi and Derek's friends, Iris' bat mitzvah was a veritable tableau of Dave and Lisa's friends from around the globe. Of course, the Leslie-chans from Kathmandu and Scott from Phnom Penh broadened the horizons, but the best part was truly the depth and breadth of these friendships that have lasted for three+ decades from high school, college and our 1970s travels around the world.

Although it was a short July 4th w/end, as many had to return to their homes on Sunday, for a reunion of much loved distant friends, this had to be one of the most affectionate gathering in a long time (at least a among us...). Eduardo and Helena from San Rafael, Jeffoi and Maggie from Maine, Steve and Betty from Oakland, Seth and Vicki from Berkeley, Allen and his wife from Seattle, Randy and Cynda from LA with Davis and Catherine, Scott and us regrouping from Boulder, along with many wonderful, warm-hearted local friends of Dave and Lisa's among us (or us among them...).

In so many ways, Scott and Dave are the Alpha and Omega of my own life, two exceptional, lifelong friends from our madcap yet stimulating college years who have helped guide, teach and protect me during my own route through the wadis, passes and peaks of life. I owe them both huge debts of trust and kindness over the years. Their friendship, their devotion, their love and generosity of spirit have been gracious companions over the past forty years... from 1972 to 2011... our lives have been intertwined, our wives have become friends, our children have grown up playing and caring for each other, our broader families have known each other, our homes have been a refuge from the storms full of laughter, food and joy since we have nestled separately in Cambodia, Oregon and Nepal while never being that far apart from each other.

Since meeting, we have never really parted...

Such, I guess, is the purpose and, in truth, life's deeper meaning for these secular and sacred events, the chance and meaning for old friends and family to gather, hug each other, share their lives, promise to see each other again soon, plan new occasions to reunite, wistfully remember past stories and adventures, take plenty of photos, meet each other's children who have become tender youth or near-adults, tell affectionately of our parents and siblings, tease each other on the years passed and passing, and think thoughtfully of the years to come...

Et voila, poof, it all disappears so quickly, so remorselessly, more tender mercies and memories added to the piles of joys and affections that make our lives and lighten our days...

Til we call the taxi in the morning to throw the bags in back, say, once again, "airport!" to whisk ourselves into the future of our own creation.

Last stop: Palm Beach Gardens, time with Mom, Claudia and Baxter ("bark twice if you're in Florida!")... the joys of family embrace that last a lifetime... or more... generations, actually... in this case three generations...

To be continued...

Foreign Employment for Nepalis by Joshua S. Leslie

FOREIGN EMPLOYMENT
The Flip side of Remittances

A large number of under-SLC students are eyeing foreign employment bringing huge foreign remittances back to Nepal. The question is it a long term solution?

By Joshua S. Leslie
Spotlight Magazine
July 2nd, 2011

Every day more than eight hundred young Nepalese leave the country hoping to get a job in the Gulf and East Asian countries. However, all are not lucky and many have returned with empty hands even after working years.

According to Nepal’s Central Bank, Nepal received over 230 billion NRs from foreign remittances in 2009-2010, covering over 22% of the country's GDP, which is more than the annual budget of the government; however, the flip side of such an over-reliance on remittances have been the low SLC results in the country.

The decline in the number of students passing their SLC exam compounds fears of Nepal turning into a country that supports developed and developing countries, especially the Gulf States and India, by providing prodigious amounts of unskilled laborers. The Ministry of Labor and Transport shows that Nepal is currently sending over 300,000 people for foreign employment every year, and the country is estimated to have around 6.5 percent of the total population absent from Nepal, significantly higher than the official record of 3.3 percent.

Experts argue that high rates of poverty and a high unemployment rate further exacerbate the problem of mass migration as youth begin to feel disenfranchised by the lack of job opportunities available in Nepal. Furthermore, the high salaries, compared to local earnings, for these unskilled positions in foreign markets make a potential laborer more determined to find a job in a foreign country than in Nepal.

Nepal seems to find its absolute advantage within the global economic market by providing cheap, unskilled laborers to more advanced countries. A case study done in 2002 on the amount of money remitted per person found that migrants in India remit around 9,000 NRs per year, whereas migrants in Western countries are able to send an average 450,000 NRs, and remittances from Gulf States average 90,000 NRs per year. Nepal's GNI per capita in 2009 was $440 (31,500 NRs per year), clearly demonstrating an almost pure arbitrage between working in Nepal and in foreign states.

The opportunity cost of a college education, especially if one wants to reach a Masters or PhD level in Nepal, has lost its intrinsic value as post-secondary schooling is extremely costly and the current low SLC test scores seem to indicate that Nepali society at large is aware of the futility in finding professional, well-paying jobs in the Nepali market.

Therefore, the encouragement and support usually afforded to pre-SLC students begins to diminish as parents realize that they are only pushing their children into a deeper and more difficult abyss, so instead of putting money into their child's education, a family would rather risk entrusting their child's future well-being to a manpower agency rather than an educational institution. With a rise in the number of workers going to foreign lands and earning more money in jobs that require less skills than they could possibly earn in Nepal, Nepalese students themselves are probably not as keen to study and pass their SLC without at least a semblance of assurance over their immediate future.

Foreign countries use the large pool of unskilled laborers currently available from Nepal to decrease their own costs, but as xenophobia, protection of citizen’s rights, and immigration become larger problems within foreign countries in the near future, it would be foolhardy for Nepal to always rely on foreign countries to provide jobs for its population.

Therefore, Nepal's SLC results will not increase without substantial assurances of high paying, professional jobs by market forces and the Government of Nepal.

Until then, this country will remain a pool in which foreign countries remove the necessary flow of young educated people -- before they finish their educations.